Thankful #20: Having my Parenting Methods Challenged

Most people are not thankful to have their parenting style scrutinized or questioned, but you know what, I am.  I was told today that my disciplinary methods of utilizing the Time Out Chair & separating the two fighting boys into different rooms were “Lame”.  I was then told that spankings & hitting harder than the child himself could hit was a much better option.  Striking the child was the only way to get a point across.  Period.

Ugg.

While I clearly disagreed, I had to think about WHY I chose my parenting choices.  Were mine really any better?  Were there holes in mine?  Was I really just being too soft on the boys…were they running me?!  And what was really so wrong with the alternative?  I don’t like debates or confrontation,  but I really don’t like being called lame or having someone insinuate that I’m a bad parent. So I had to stand my ground.  Aaaaaaaand the discussion ensued.

Okay, so it doesn’t really matter who said what, but basically I left feeling pretty damned confident in myself.  And why is that?  Because I went with my gut. Then when I sat back & had to think about (and defend) my gut instincts, I still felt right.  Often in my parenting I don’t think about what I’m doing or why.  I just do stuff because it was the way my parents did it or because it just feels right.  But I really should look at myself & analyze how, what & why I do what I do.  After all, these are my children and they are the most important things in my life, and I want to be sure that I’m not just coasting along, but am actually doing it right & for the right reasons.  I am thankful for the individuals who question or challenge my parenting choices because they force me to really think about it.  And then they reaffirm my self confidence.

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