Most people are not thankful to have their parenting style scrutinized or questioned, but you know what, I am. I was told today that my disciplinary methods of utilizing the Time Out Chair & separating the two fighting boys into different rooms were “Lame”. I was then told that spankings & hitting harder than the child himself could hit was a much better option. Striking the child was the only way to get a point across. Period.
While I clearly disagreed, I had to think about WHY I chose my parenting choices. Were mine really any better? Were there holes in mine? Was I really just being too soft on the boys…were they running me?! And what was really so wrong with the alternative? I don’t like debates or confrontation, but I really don’t like being called lame or having someone insinuate that I’m a bad parent. So I had to stand my ground. Aaaaaaaand the discussion ensued.
Okay, so it doesn’t really matter who said what, but basically I left feeling pretty damned confident in myself. And why is that? Because I went with my gut. Then when I sat back & had to think about (and defend) my gut instincts, I still felt right. Often in my parenting I don’t think about what I’m doing or why. I just do stuff because it was the way my parents did it or because it just feels right. But I really should look at myself & analyze how, what & why I do what I do. After all, these are my children and they are the most important things in my life, and I want to be sure that I’m not just coasting along, but am actually doing it right & for the right reasons. I am thankful for the individuals who question or challenge my parenting choices because they force me to really think about it. And then they reaffirm my self confidence.